Blog Archive

Quick Hit Friday . . .

Posted by 2 Dollar Productions Friday, October 27, 2006

It's a strange Friday in Austin as this week has caused me to think that Britney Spears might be smarter than a turnip, and Jessica Simpson might have sunken to the turnip's level.

For Spears, it seems that the pop princess may have been so wily as to fool the world about the real name of her baby, Sutton Pierce. Britney has refused to confirm the name until his picture appears in People magazine and rumors now suggest he is actually called Jayden James.

If this is true then Britney and K-Fed played us like cheap violins, and it makes me sick (though I do have a grudging respect for her now).

As for Simpson, she recently talked up her Father Joe Simpson to Jane magazine and addressed his sleazy talk about her breasts ("You can't cover those suckers up!").

"No, I've had double-D's for a long time," Jess helpfully points out. "Are you kidding? No. My family is extremely close. I talk to my mom about my sex life. That's not something that creeps me out." "We're Podunk Southern."

Simpson grew up in a semi-affluent suburb of Dallas, not some backwoods town in the middle of nowhere. It's not reasonable to blame your creepy Dad/Manager's shortcomings on your geographical background. She should simply say that I wish my Dad would stop talking about my breasts - there's just no excuse.

During his radio show this week, Rush Limbaugh criticized actor Michael J. Fox – who suffers from Parkinson's Disease – over a political ad in which Fox shows signs of that disease while speaking about stem cell research. Limbaugh claims that Fox was "either off his medication or acting" while filming the spot.

Limbaugh is quite simply a fucking idiot. I'm sure there are ways to express that more eloquently, but it's true and I don’t feel like wasting any more space on a man who is so flat-out backwards and repugnant that I can't honestly believe that anyone listens to him at all.

"[Anna] waits forever to bury him [her deceased son, Daniel] and two days after he dies, she's selling pictures of him to the tabloids and I'm thinking, 'What a freaking waste of a human being, my sister is.'"- Anna Nicole Smith's sister, Danna Hogan

I think that about sums it up, but damn was Anna Nicole good-looking in those Guess ads.

Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes have confirmed reports they are to be married in Italy on November 18.

There have been no reports as of yet if aliens from the highest order of select Scientologists will attend the nuptials. But I wouldn't rule it out.

To end with a good image, let's go with this one:

I know people will argue that this is not good at all, however, despite the logistical challenges that it might present it would likely be fun for at least one night to discover just how gravity works in a real-world example . . . Happy Friday.



  1. HA! Battlefield Earth. Quite easily, in my estimation, the biggest shitfest of all time. The only way they coulda made it worse was if Forrest Whitaker's part was played by Rush Limbaugh.

  2. JLee Says:
  3. hahah...I would love to do that if I were a celeb. Have a baby, tell the press it's some dumbass name like "Hortense Louise" or something, just to see it printed everywhere! lol
    I agree with the Jessica not being "podunk Southern" I know exactly where she grew up, and it's far from it!
    Great ending pic, she's got her own planetary system. ;)

  4. I knew a guy, who went to De Soto High School, who had a friend who fingerbanged J-Simp, in the back of a Toyota hatchback in a DQ parkinglot. If thats not white trash, I dont know what is...

    I also heard that Rush Limbaugh eats grass to induce vomiting; talk about a fuckstain on the sheets of American radio.

  5. drëâmè® Says:
  6. Limbaugh IS a fucking waste of human life.

    Whoa... what is up with the packages of those aliens... O_O

  7. nobich Says:
  8. Happy Friday $2!!!!!
    love your quick hits!

  9. Idig - I've heard the same thing about Battlefield Earth, but I've never seen it (although I've thought about it for years to test the badness).

    Jlee - I know exactly where she grew up as well as my high school used to play hers in sports. And I like the ending as well as those are some definite orbs (I think that's a planetary term).

    Tbone - You've got me beat on J Simpson stories as that is pretty damn trash, although I do love a good Butterfinger blast now and again. Bad joke.

    Dr - That's the benefit of being an alien, and not being Limbaugh who does suck quite a bit.

    Nobich - Right back at you and thanks as I like collecting and writing these little tidbits.

  10. Sherry Says:
  11. Like the new digs.

    Rush Limbaugh IS a fucking idiot!

    That last pick ... oy. Not attractive at all. In fact, it causes me pain - but just like at the carnival freak shows ... I can't turn away.

  12. Lucy Says:
  13. Very cool new webpage design!

  14. Sherry - Thanks and much like a carnival sideshow act - one night might be worth the ride. Ha.

    Luce - Thank you as it's been a work in progress for awhile, and it's not done yet. Just the beginning.

  15. SymplyAmused Says:
  16. Cool redo on the site!! No comment on Rush either.... : ) Happy Friday!

  17. JLee Says:
  18. yeah, like the new look!

  19. SymplyAmused - Thanks as my brother and I dig the colors, and we'll be adding a banner and other stuff soon (with any luck).

    Jlee - I'm glad as I wanted to get feedback, and positive is usually the best kind.

  20. Kayla Says:
  21. Yikes!
    My back aches looking at the huge melons on that chic..
    Maybe fun for 1 night, but not on a daily basis, eh?
    Words can't express my disdain for Rush Limbohead. What a waste of space. Loser of the 1st order.
    I say we send him back to space with the rest of the crew of Battlefield Earth.
    Hell..even THEY wouldn't want him!

    Jessica talks sex with mommy??
    I'm offended by her excusing her dysfunctional family by saying "we're podunk southern"
    My Arkansas backwoods cousins have more class than that!

    To end on a good note..
    Happy Friday!

  22. Nancy Drew Says:
  23. Now THAT is an insult to turnips everywhere!!!

  24. Kayla - I am in complete agreement on most, especially about Jessica and her Mom and it is just insulting to most people south of the Mason-Dixon line. I don't need Jessica speaking for me at all. And "Maybe fun for 1 night, but not on a daily basis, eh?" is 100 percent right. Happy Friday back at you.

    Nancy Drew - I know. Turnips were an easy target, however, because they rarely talk back. Cowardly turnips!


About Me

Contact Us

You can reach us by email at