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A New Journey With Marching Orders . . .

Posted by 2 Dollar Productions Wednesday, August 16, 2006

"Midway through the journey of our life, I found myself within a dark wood, for the right way had been lost." - Dante, "The Divine Comedy"


There's nothing comedic about the new diet I was sent this past weekend by my nutritionist.

Of course there wasn't a whole lot of hilarious happenings in Dante's work either, so maybe it is applicable and not just something that's on my mind because I'm currently reading "The Dante Club."

Regardless, my journey towards a shot at NYC modeling/commercials, easy money, orgies, and most importantly potential contacts for our movie scripts has started for the last time.

This past June I met with the agent for the third time, and the verdict was close but not quite as this look didn't cut the mustard:


Since then, however, the agent has spoken with my nutritionist and instead of the 5 week program that I undertook this past time, I now am staring at an 8 - 10 week program full of blood, sweat and brown rice.

My new marching orders look like this:

Meal 1 - 2 Scoops Whey

Cardio - 30 minutes eliptical or step-mill

Supplement 1- 1 serving Cellmass

Meal 2 - 6 egg whites (1 yolk), 1/2 cup oatmeal in water

Meal 3 - 6oz. turkey or chicken, 50 grams of carbs from brown rice or sweet potato, veggies optional

Meal 4 - 6oz. chicken, turkey, or white fish, 50 grams of carbs from brown rice or sweet potato, veggies optional

Meal 5 - 2 scoops of whey, 1 handful of unsalted almonds if still hungry

Meal 6 - 8oz. steak or salmon, 40 grams of carbs from brown rice or sweet potato, veggies optional

Meal 7 - 8 egg whites

Take multi-vitamin, Axis-HT, NOxplode before training, your second serving of Cellmass after training (if you are training in the morning then you take your first serving after training and then your last serving before bed at night), take 5g of glutamine with every meal and 10g before training.

Drink at least one gallon of water per day.

I want you doing cardio six days per week.

No cheat days or cheat meals. I will increase and decrease your calorie intake when I deem it appropriate.

I need pictures once per week.


Maybe somebody should just shoot me now because life isn't as much fun without alcohol, sugar, spices and most carbs.

But in the immortal words of the poets in Whitesnake, "here I go again on my own."

{Editor's note: I may have taken liberty with the lyrics for that song, but you get the point.}

-BDS

18 comments

  1. Miss Ash Says:
  2. Those nutritionists are torturous. My trainer had me on a similar plan, egg whites, oatmeal, veggies, 1/4 cup of rice, bleh. I did lost a ton of weight, i've since gained it back...boo to me.

    Whatever is Cellmas though?

     
  3. Miss Ash Says:
  4. Oh yeah and i forgot "hubba hubba" LOL

     
  5. SymplyAmused Says:
  6. Good luck! Better you than ME!

     
  7. Lucy Says:
  8. In my opinion, that look kinda does cut the mustard.

     
  9. WHY WHY WHY OH WHY, are you doing this to yourself?!!?!?

    I think you look damn HOT - look for work elsewhere... Life is too damn short to be eating shit like that!!!

     
  10. Samantha Says:
  11. You rock if you can stick to that plan for eight weeks. With a body like that I would take one look in the mirror and say screw it I'm gonna go have beer.

     
  12. What a sucky diet! Nothing about says fun. Good luck!

     
  13. Miss Ash - CellMass is something to try and keep your body growing after you work out because you're breaking down muscle, and if you've been on a similar diet, then you can appreciate the horrible nature of it.

    Symplyamused - Thanks & I wish it were someone else too.

    Luce - I wish you were the NY agent as it was close, but no cigar.

    Friday - That's a question I ask myself several times, and I have no good answer except to see if I can do it and it could be interesting. We'll see.

    Jenni222 - I'll take any good words, but I shouldn't have used the condiment saying because most of those are off my list too.

    Jackie - Send some of those beams East towards New York because I'll take all the help I can get.

    Samantha - That's one reason I want to try it because it's a strict regimen that's as much a mental program as physical. But I do want a beer. Right now.

    Sarcastic - Brown rice is only fun to a certain subset of people that I don't often associate with. But I am now one of them and hopefully they will embrace me as a brother.

     
  14. JLee Says:
  15. you look hot! it's worth it :)

     
  16. Anonymous Says:
  17. And you wonder why people are fat!! I have to try it.

     
  18. BigBill Says:
  19. Sounds like your nutritionist has you on the right path, but the jury is still out for me on whether I like taking all the suppliments like NO's and Cell mass etc protien powder.
    I usually mess around with those in November December January February March and April in May. I also hit the gym 5 days at week minimum. Then I slowly peter off of them and really start trying to cut.
    Then in the summer I take it easy. I still watch what I eat and hit the weights at least 3 times a week.
    I believe in the protien powder and supplimentaion of that. It works but takes dedication. I was trying to consume about 600 grams a day of protien when I weighed about 320 lbs. I eat tons of eggs and beef and pork and chicken anyhow but I still needed to suppliment.. I ended up loosing like 85 lbs and thats what got me started.. Good luck !! Check out my blog and the past months I have some pretty good posts in the past..

     
  20. JLee - We will see it it's worth it because I already miss real food.

    Girl Behind - I can't say I recommend it for very long, but sometimes it's good to test the body.

    BigB - Thanks for the information, and that is quite a bit of protein as I usually shoot for about half of that. But then again, I'm only weighing in at 190 lbs, but I appreciate the info as the supplement thoughts were interesting.

     
  21. m Says:
  22. What discipline, what deprivaction... The thought of it makes me want to go have a dinner of pizza and martinis. God I had great Thai food for lunch.

    The "if still hungry" part made me laugh. Good luck.

     
  23. m Says:
  24. Oh for chrissakes deprivation, that's how you spell it.

     
  25. Emma Says:
  26. I didn't read the blog, too distracted by your picture.

     
  27. M - That was a good line, and I also liked the one that ended with "when I deem appropriate." Thai sounds good.

    Emma - It wasn't distracting enough for the agent, so this next time it will be better if I can stick it out. We'll see.

     
  28. Unknown Says:
  29. You have to pay for the easy money baby... And I'm sure that you'll look better than you already do. If you survive.

    Symplyamused said it so well.

     
  30. I will survive, but I won't be happy.

     

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