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Whole Lotta Smug . . .

Posted by 2 Dollar Productions Monday, April 09, 2007

"Eskimos are smug," - John Turturro, "Anger Management"

There's something about Whole Foods that irritates me, and I wasn't able to put my finger on it until this past weekend when I was picking up a few things for Easter.

I don't frequent Whole Foods all that often because if you can afford to do the majority of your shopping there then you've got a lot more disposable income than I do.

It's good for specialty items like seafood, coffee and beer and I while I like the ability to pick these kinds of things up on occasion, I can't say I enjoy the smugness that oozes from the store.

It's not the structure itself, but rather the patrons, and to a lesser degree, the staff. I finally realized this as I paced the aisles this past weekend, grappling with the unsalted almond bin and the self-satisfied, pompous looks of at least 63% of the other shoppers. {Editor's Note: This percentage is merely a rough estimate and has absolutely no science or qualification behind it.}

It was so prevalent that I started laughing because it seems a bit ridiculous that so many shoppers feel entitled to some sort of grocery-purchasing elite stature just because they choose to buy organic and pricey vegetables and then have them sacked inside a paper (not plastic) bag.

I'm all for less pesticides in my food and for being Earth-friendly, but you could cut the smugness quotient in half and still be mildly irritating.

That being said, if I were single then I definitely spend more time at Whole Foods because the genetic and store-bought bodies on display were far superior than the ones I typically see at the HEB by my loft. It seems vaguely ironic that the same people buying all natural foods to put in their bodies would boast some truly spectacular examples of silicone and saline, but that is a contradiction I'm willing to overlook.

Judge not lest ye be judged and all that jazz.



  1. JLee Says:
  2. I know what you mean about this. I feel as if everyone is looking at me saying "hey, didn't we see you at WalMart the other day?? You don't belong here!!" Then they all point and scream like "Invasion of the Body Snatchers". Ok, I embellish...

  3. I dislike smug people. If you gotta problem with me, say it so I can smack ya around a bit!
    As for buying "organic" foods and all that hippy crap. I hate hippies!

  4. Robert Says:
  5. I'd shop there but I believe my only hope of someday accidentally aquiring a superhuman mutation is through the unintended consequenses of eating genetically modified foods.

  6. Jlee - Let's hope it doesn't come to that or we'll all in big trouble. Ha.

    WhatIgot - I'm not so sure it's an active philosophy of looking down on others, but it's definitely an overwhelming self-satisfaction that irritates the hell out of me.

    Robert - That's true, you could grow a third eye, lose an appendage or something far worse. I never considered that before now.

  7. I don't typically eat healthy so I probably would not be found dead in a store like that, so therefore I have never encountered the type of smugness you are referring to.

  8. i used to shop at wholefoods all the time. and yea, come to think of it... there is a certain amount of smugness there. i just go there coz it was the closest grocery store to my old apartment.

  9. Melissa Says:
  10. I'm more of a Central Market kind of girl. Every time I go to Whole Foods the vacant stares of the malnourished creep me out. Sometimes life requires a cheeseburger.

  11. Trina - Lucky you. Ha. But I'm sure there's enough smugness in other places to catch your fair share.

    Lastlife - I shop at Whole Foods a few times a month, and see nothing inherently wrong with it - it's some of the people who need to have a box of organic sprouts dumped on their heads that bother me.

    Melissa - Agreed on the life/cheesburger connection. I like Central Market better on the whole as well, but the WF is closer to my work.

  12. locomocos Says:
  13. Whole Foods and Wild Oats markets are crap. If you want organic - go to the nearest co-op. People who shop at Whole Foods want their produce to be "pesticide free" - but want a perfectly formed cucumber and lettuce with no holes. 80% of all organic produce goes to the canneries to make the organic soup you can purchase at Safeway. I'll keep my rant to a minimum - but I went in there for lunch one day and bought a PB&J for $5. I must've been smoking crack for paying that much.

    And everyone was looking at me too - cause I was wearing a 'SUCKA' sign around my neck as I ate it.

  14. I like that visual of the PB & J and the sucka tag. Ha. But I agree about the Co-op thing as there's one I used to go to, Wheatesville Co-op, that was really good and near campus. I wonder if it's still there . . .


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