"Pardon me while I whip this out," - Cleavon Little, "Blazing Saddles"
Well, it's a gray day in February around Austin. The weather is vaguely bleak, work is calling my name and yet I cannot bear not to discuss the truly important issues like:
Paris Hilton is suing the owners of a website, www.parisexposed, and demanding they close it because visitors can pay to view nude photos and other items that once belonged to her.
Hilton's suit says the website -- which displays photos, home videos, diary entries and audiotapes of her conversations, as well as images of her passport -- is "one of the most reprehensible invasions of privacy of a celebrity". Hilton also said:
"I was appalled to learn that people are exploiting my and my sister's private personal belongings for commercial gain," her court statement says.
Hilton then mentioned that you can buy her sex tape for $29.95 virtually anywhere else on the Internet.
Katie Holmes has turned down a $2 million deal to star in the sequel to 'Batman Begins' due to "scheduling conflicts." 
The scheduling conflicts include the fact that Tom Cruise won't let her out of the basement for the extended period of time it would take to shoot the movie.
It's rumored that Britney Spears has been calling former flame Justin Timberlake to re-heat the oven, but JT won't take her calls. 
Shocking.
I wouldn't take her calls either as Timberlake is riding high and dining on filet mignon (Jessica Biel, Scarlett Johannsen) and I can't see why he would trade that in for ground chuck. It's simply a poor trade.
Daniel "Harry Potter" Radcliffe made headlines with a semi-nude turn in a West End play, and recently shot some pics for a lay-out that generated controversy as well.
I can't say I blame Radcliffe for not wanting to get typecast as the boy wizard, however, I don't think I would want to hint at bestial love with a white horse either.
Decisions. Decisions.
But speaking of Harry Potter, it was announced that the final book will be released on July 21st. 
The announcement caused children to begin foaming at the mouth, parents to start planning for the drop date, and for adults still living with their parents to begin constructing tents outside of bookstores around the world while digging their wands out of the closet.
Courtney Love is claiming that she's been approached to replace Paula Abdul as an "American Idol" judge.
This doesn't seem particularly strange to me as you're basically trading in one current pill-popping singer for another supposedly ex-pill-popping singer. The main difference seems to be the hair color.
Denise Richards and Richie Sambora were spotted this week still together and strolling along the beach. 
And while the relationship might not be Living on a Prayer, Sambora's belly could use some Bad Medicine in a hurry to help ease the bloating.
But I hate to end things poorly, so let's roll out with a pleasing image:
So treat your ass well today, give it a little cushion before heading out for the evening and . . . Happy Friday!
-BDS
My 15-year-old, a Harry Potter fan, was thoroughly disgusted by the Daniel Radcliffe photos. Ironically, when I was fifteen, I was hanging out with my college-aged sister's theatre-major friends, many of whom were starring in a deaf version (in sign language by actors onstage, with voiceovers done by actors at the sidelines) of Equus. It was a brilliant production, but I was SHOCKED when I saw PEOPLE I KNEW COMPLETELY NAKED. I imagine this, in a way, is how lots of little girls feel about Daniel Radcliffe. It's very traumatic. And icky.
I'm sorry, horse porn is horse porn, no matter who's riding the pony.
Wendy - That is an interesting perspective on the whole affair. It's supposed to be a good play, but I can see how lines could easily get blurred.
WhatIGot - That is succinct and right on the money.
I think Justin is very smart to stay away.
The Richie Sambora picture was just sad. First, someone needs to explain to him about sun block or least sun tan lotion. Next, someone needs to explain to me what he sees in Denise Richards. I will grant you that she is hot, but from what I understand it is all about status for her. Of course, men in middle age have been known to go a little crazy.
haha! how i love blazing saddles! it's a toss up between that and Young Frankenstein for me....
but onto Naughty Potty - bad for him and that horse, good for little girls everywhere to finally see what's under those robes!!!
What's up with that pic of Paris? She looks like Leeloo Dallas's daughter from The 69th Element or something...
And can I mention that oddly enough, I would take Paula Abdul's advise on talent over Courtney's anyday. Yikes.
Good Friday Post!!!
Sarcastic - Richie does look like he's in dire need of some sunscreen, but I also think you answered the Richards question as she still looks pretty damn good. Shallow, but . . .
LocoMocos - Thanks and everyone should love Blazing Saddles. Hilarious. Paris does look bizarre in that picture. Makes you wonder what she looks like when she's not all made up.
"Blazing Saddles" rocks! and is very UN-pc. Ah, the good old days. I don't have much else except I'm dying to see if Courtney Love lets Simon suck on her boob on national tv. Hey, if she lets some guy at Arby's do it...
Happy Friday :)
Slopmaster - It's probably just petty jealousy because he had Heather Locklear and now Denise Richards so . . . then again, just being a rock star will get you far in life.
Jlee - Happy Friday and another Blazing Saddles fan. That is great. It is far from PC, although obviously far funnier/filthier things can happen at Arby's.
Media whore indeed and I've heard that rumor. I wouldn't be surprised as it's possible, albeit unlikely, that she is the smartest person in the world. A puppetmaster (sp?) just pulling the strings.