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Pup-Tents and Propulsion . . .

Posted by 2 Dollar Productions Wednesday, March 07, 2007

I am not a gear-head or a car enthusiast by nature, however, when I received an email from my Audi dealer this morning at work, I couldn't stand up for nearly 30 minutes or else I would have earned a one-way trip to Human Resources.


The erection-inducing vehicle in question is the forthcoming Audi R8, which will be delivered in Europe during the spring of 2007 and the first U.S. cars will arrive later in 2007.

And let's not pretend that this kind of vehicle is incapable of causing lustful stares in both sexes every time it drove down the street. It's like movable Viagra and Spanish Fly rolled into one streamlined package of chrome and steel.


Pricing for the U.S. has not been finalized but is expected to start at about $130,000, which means I will start cutting back on Lattes and Chapstick and Pornography immediately to start my R8 fund.

I also really need to sell a script because that would definitely put me closer to the mark and give me something classy to drive to the premiere.

Actually, I think Audi should use my slogan in men's magazines and boast that the R8 is "like movable Viagra and Spanish Fly rolled into one streamlined package of chrome and steel" and in lieu of payment, they could simply send me a car.

Fair is fair.

-BDS

13 comments

  1. BostonPobble Says:
  2. Hell, that thing gave *me* an erection. It is a thing of beauty. Wow... Thanks for sharing this morning.

    As for the slogan, it's definitely worth the car.

     
  3. Anonymous Says:
  4. Awesome! And yeah, I like the slogan a lot :)

     
  5. You should send that slogan. It is bound to attract buyers.

     
  6. julia Says:
  7. yum.

    for my money, i'd do something silly like travel around the world. but that's a tempting second.

    and yeah, i'm a little hard.

     
  8. Bostonpobble - I am a giver, and
    I will keep your testimonial in mind if and when I contact Audi about the slogan. Ha.

    Anonymous - Awesome indeed & thanks.

    Sarcastic - I think so too. Unfortunately, I doubt they will have to try too hard to attract buyers to this thing of beauty. Creativity be damned.

    Julia - Good. Chock another up on the list, and while I'm with you on a trip around the world, I figure if I could afford the car that I could definitely pay for the trip as well. The best of both worlds. Ha. I want it all.

     
  9. Melissa Says:
  10. Funny you should post this, I was going to email you today and ask about the TT. I've been car shopping lately and I wanted a review from you on performance and upkeep.

    Please?

     
  11. Miss Ash Says:
  12. C'est Bon!!!

    What do you drive currently?

     
  13. tkkerouac Says:
  14. come see my daughter raymis ass.

     
  15. Melissa & Miss Ash - I currently drive an Audi TT Roadster, a silver convertible with a black top. It doesn't hold a candle to the R8, but it has been fun to drive. The upkeep has been minimal as the warranty was pretty solid (4 yr, 50,000 miles I think) and during that time you only pay for tires. I've had a few things break down, but nothing major and I've kept the mileage pretty low and paid the thing off last year. I dig the interior with all the chrome and I sprang for the upgraded sound system and HP and am glad that I did. It's a complete two-seat sports car, but I didn't feel cramped inside like I did with the BMW Z3 when it first came out. Finally, The dealership close to you also makes a big difference in overrall care and quality as my one in Plano was excellent and when I moved to Austin I have generally been disappointed. Hope that helps & let me know if you have specific questions.

    Tkkerouac - I'm sure you're referencing a donkey of course.

     
  16. Linda Says:
  17. I once dated a car nut, and I will say that when we went to exotic car events I was one happy camper .... high performance cars have an amazing effect! ; )

     
  18. I knew it. Ha.

     
  19. I remember the first time I drove an H2. Oh, the looks I got from the ladies. And a couple of guys, which kinda freaked me out a bit.

     
  20. That's the price you pay for driving an H2 my friend. Ha. I'm sure one balances out the other.

     

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