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The Evolution Of Tara Reid . . .

Posted by 2 Dollar Productions Wednesday, December 19, 2007

I hate to waste space writing about Tara Reid since she's a considerable waste of it in the first place. However, I recently saw this picture of Reid in Australia wearing a swimsuit and looking gaunt which caused me to re-consider this stance.


Reid resembles two popsicle sticks that are about to break with a pair of cantaloupes tied on top to make the whole package wobbly. It's not a pretty sight. But this evolution (or de-evolution) of Reid is easy to see in bikini shots as her career has faded into oblivion.



In these shots, the actress looks nice and relaxed. These would be the "American Pie" and "The Big Lebowski" years where Reid was an up and comer after a passable turn in 'Pie' coupled with a small yet spectacular role in 'Lebowski' where she uttered the highly memorable line: "I'll suck your cock for $1,000."



This time it was years later after a string of flops including "The Boss's Daughter" and "Alone in the Dark," the latter of which Reid played a highly intelligent scientist (who cast this movie?). This was also around the time that Reid's horrendous plastic surgery choices were also bearing fruit.


And finally, Reid's career catches up to present day where she seems to have stopped eating and is appearing at club openings in Australia for money.

These things happen in Hollywood, and if I had the time to study the phenomenon, I would be interested to check the correlation between swimsuit shots and career trajectories.

Research is the key.

-BDS

21 comments

  1. Heff Says:
  2. You left out "Tara's Red Carpet Titty Extravaganza" which was CLASSIC in my book.

     
  3. I don't know BDS, you did a major dis-service to your blog by posting about this twit-biscuit. :)

     
  4. Heff - Yeah - the time she looked like a wolverine had been suckling on her nipples was (in)famous. Ugly. Ha.

    Upset Waittress - It's a step back, and I hated to do it. But I like "twit-biscuit" and might have to borrow that for future use. Thanks.

     
  5. Miss Ash Says:
  6. You know when American Pie came out she was actually rather attractive....then it all went downhill from there. She looks like a lollipop.

     
  7. Anonymous Says:
  8. I'd still hit that.

     
  9. Miss Ash - I agree on both fronts. Since 'Pie' it was too much booze and bad plastic surgery - a combination which can wear anyone down.

    WhatIgot - If you boiled it down - yes. It would be a good story at the very least.

     
  10. Jenny Says:
  11. I love "twit bisquit" too. If I steal something said on your blog, is it really stealing?

    The other important thing to remember is; don't get your plastic surgery done at a Strip Mall. (oh there's a pun there too!)

     
  12. Jenny Says:
  13. This comment has been removed by the author.  
  14. Mr. DNA Says:
  15. Who knew that drugs and alcohol could ruin someone?

    I think I'll have to rework my health plan.

     
  16. Anonymous Boxer - Good line indeed. And I think that it IS stealing, although I applaud the general logic. Of course, I always love a good pun as well.

    Mr. DNA - Maybe ruin is too strong a word, but the body can only take so much. It's a fine line, however, I wouldn't give those up entirely because we've all got to have some fun.

     
  17. I made the mistake of eating while looking at those pics of Tera Reid.

    I threw up a little in my mouth.

     
  18. Karen Says:
  19. It's hard to know which pic is more unattractive - the really skinny one taken here in Australia (is she really here....who knew?) or the one in the black and white bikini where she's got the tits of a 75 year old woman and don't even get me started on that botched "tummy tuck". Twit biscuit indeed - only UW could come up with that....lol.

     
  20. Hermes Says:
  21. I like the research idea. You should move to Canada. With our rules, you might be able to get a research grant from the Canada Arts Council. I'd read that study.

     
  22. vivavavoom Says:
  23. one word: 'cocaine'. no wonder she is opening up clubs...free drugs, easy access,and some moola to boot. poor girl. she actually was pretty good in the first american pie movie.
    I have this theory, I think Paris Hilton is a huge drug dealer/enabler. seems that the minute anyone hangs out with her, their career goes down the toilet....britney, lindsay, tara, etc....and they get arrested within a year.

    I am reading too much perez huh?!

     
  24. Idig - I don't blame you, and I'm sorry. Those kinds of images should never be consumed while eating. Selah.

    Gypsy - I would go with the horrible tit job, and tummy tuck that looks like it was done by some back-alley surgeon who flunked out of vetinerary (sp?) college. And last time I checked, she was in Australia, but my guess is that she's moved on at this point. Too bad for you. Ha.

    Getoffmylawn - That's good to know as I refuse to close off my options. It's always good to leave things open, and I can think of far worse studies than this one. Besides, it's a good excuse at the very least for looking at women in bikinis.

    Vivavavoom - Cocaine, champagne and a lack of food. That's more than one word, but I don't think your theory is too far off base. Hilton is like the ringleader of generally talentless celebs who aren't really good at any one thing, so the cluster together for support - or drugs. Who knows? And yes, Hilton can lead to far too many conspiracy theories. Ha.

     
  25. Grace Says:
  26. Love the house & pool. I'd get my picture taken there anyday.

     
  27. Let me know if you need a research assistant.

     
  28. Grace - I wouldn't mind house-sitting there myself. Tara Reid not included.

    UpsetWaitress - Good call. That story is actually leading off my Quick Hit Friday post for tomorrow. All putrid holes are generally covered around here, which is why Reid was showcased in all her glory. Ha.

    Upset Minnow - As soon as the grant money is confirmed, I will let you know.

     
  29. Joanna Cake Says:
  30. Twit biscuit indeed. To her it's all more publicity. I believe there's now a programme broadcast about being Rod Stewart's daughter. I can remember when Rod and his then girlfriend Brit Ekland made one of the first sort of fly on the wall programmes about what their life was like. And it all went downhill from there.
    Still, it does show the rest of us that even with all the cash, plastic surgery can still go wrong.

     
  31. We don't want her!! Feed her to the sharks!! haha
    I hate the fact that they pay B grade celebrities to come out here for a couple of photo ops for an opening of something. The "stars" just complain about how FAR it is and how much they hate it and go home.

    It angers me to no end!

    Although last time Paris came out here, she shagged a couple of our B-grade celebrities and acted like a true trashbag skank. Made for great news stories. Hilarious!

     
  32. Havingmycake - I didn't know that Kimberly Stewart had a show as she's famous for no reason at all. Even less so than Reid who has at least been in a few movies. And yes, plastic surgery can go very wrong indeed.

    GirlFrida - Great to see you back, and maybe it was the Australia mentioning that did it. Love the Paris story, and I can believe it too. I figured that would be irritating to have these "celebs" come over there for cash. Ridiculous. I'm sure you wouldn't pay a nickel - although it might be a good story.

     

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