“The question isn't "what are we going to do," the question is "what aren't we going to do?",” Matthew Broderick, ‘Ferris Bueller’s Day Off’
It’s not much of a question for me today. I’m not going to do much work outside of eating two breakfast tacos, jumping on a weekly meeting conference call and wrapping up some paperwork before hitting the road by 3 p.m. After that, it’s still up in the air, but anything is better than sitting under fluorescent lighting, even the 100 degree heat outside seems more appealing.
So before I head to the break room, let’s look at the hard stories of the week such as:
Lindsay Lohan’s house was burglarized this past week as thieves made off with bags, shoes and jewelry.
"The safe was ripped out of the wall, and the door was off the hinges and door handles removed," Lindsay's mother, Dina Lohan, told People magazine.
Lindsay's father, Michael Lohan, tells TMZ he thinks it was "an inside job" because the alarm wasn't turned on.
Her father believes it was an inside job because he was inside her house at the time of the robbery with a crow bar and ski mask.
Reality TV dad Jon Gosselin told Us Magazine he’s had enough of taping “Jon & Kate Plus 8” and wishes he could quit the show.
"I wish I had a 9 to 5 job instead of the nightmare I'm living. This is 24/7," he told Usmagazine.com. "I don't even want to do taping for the show anymore." 
I only pray that Jon takes Kate Gosselin with him when he leaves and begins his shift at the local McDonalds.
Jessica Biel was labeled the most dangerous celebrity on the Web this week by security technology company McAfee Inc. as the company reported that searches for the 27-year-old actress are more likely to lead to online threats such as spyware and viruses than searches for any other celebrity.
Luckily, Danger is BDS’s middle name . . .
Miss Venezuela was named winner of the 2009 Miss Universe pageant in the Bahamas this week, but it was a musical performance by Heidi Montag that garnered the most attention.
The Hills reality star gave her first live performance, singing "Body Language" from her debut album, and she did so in a flesh-colored body suit as she gyrated her way through the song.
"I think people don't know what to expect, and how can they? It's my first performance live and it's in front of a billion eyes. So I'm very excited to show everyone what I'm coming with," said Montag prior to her performance.
Montag already showed what she’s “coming with” in her Playboy spread earlier this month, and the performance did nothing to shed any additional light on the subject.
Thousands of Madonna fans booed the singer during her concert in Bucharest, Romania this week when she stopped the concert to speak out regarding discrimination against gypsies.
"It has been brought to my attention ... that there is a lot of discrimination against Romanies and Gypsies in general in Eastern Europe," she said. "It made me feel very sad."
Thousands booed and jeered following the singer’s words.
To be fair, the crowd didn’t start to boo until Madonna cut the music and began reading palms and telling fortunes in a display of gypsy solidarity.
Following weeks of speculation about her next job, former ‘American Idol’ judge Paula Abdul announced Monday on Twitter that she has signed a deal to host the next “VH1 Divas” show which returns Sept. 17 after a four-year hiatus, MTV reports.
Abdul wrote: "Hi guys! im really excited 2 announce ill b hosting this year's 'VH1 Divas'! The show will be live on Sept 17th @ 9 pm EST." 
With so many people out of work in this country it seems distinctly unfair that Abdul should find another job so quickly.
Melanie Griffith has checked into a rehab facility in Utah – her 3rd stint in recent years - her rep confirmed to People Magazine, although the reasons for her entrance weren’t entirely clear.
"She is there to reinforce her commitment to stay healthy," says her rep Robin Baum. "This is part of a routine plan that was designed between her and her doctors years ago." 
The routine plan was designed because Griffith planned to routinely binge on alcohol and prescription pills.
As always, let’s end with a gold image or two: 
The end of the week is a fine time for vice, so smoke 'em if you've got 'em, lend yourself a helping hand if necessary and . . . Happy Friday!
-BDS
This Heidi person, her first live performance and it's in front of a huge audience and being shown on TV around the world. I dunno, maybe I'm silly, but whatever happened to "paying your dues."
Music, performing, like anything else, requires not just some God-given ability, but it requires practice. It requires a work ethic. How does she expect to be taken seriously if she goes right to the top without having earned it? You haven't climbed the mountain if you're heli-lifted to the peak. You gotta climb the damn thing. Say what you will about Madonna, but she worked her way up to the point where she can do a huge show in Romania. She toiled away on tour for years, she spent countless hours in the studio working at her craft. (Sure, it helped to whore 'round a bit.)
And this Heidi person says "people don't know what to expect." Well Heidi, you don't know what to expect. You've never played before a small audience in a tiny bar let alone a gala auditorium. Hell, you've never performed before. You yourself don't know what to expect.
That's it. I'm done with this rant. This Heidi bitch can go screw herself. I'll try to have a happy Friday anyway.
WIGSF - Man, it's Friday . . . Ha. Actually, your point is well taken as Montag is just a product of celebrity and access which is completely devoid of talent and generally undeserved. I wish her and her boyfriend would go away forever. But you can definitely enjoy Friday anyway. No question.
Damn, wigsf beats me again !
- Quick Heff Friday ! -
Lindsay STOLE HER OWN SHIT !!! Let's study evidence at hand : "thieves made off with bags, shoes and jewelry." No MAN would steal that shit !!!
Jon Gosselin "WISHES he could quit" ? Hell, if you can break a marriage, you can damn sure break a contract ! He'd miss the last of his 15 minutes if he did so, though.
Jessica Biel IS the most dangerous celebrity - that ass is a lethal weapon, and probably able to crack walnuts with a single clinch !
So you're saying Heidi Montag's performance was MORE REVEALING that her Playboy photo spread, huh ? I imagine it hurts to SUCK on TWO TOTALLY DIFFERENT features....
I imagine Madonna being "Boo'ed" didn't actually start until she picked up that guitar. Bitch can't play for shit !!! She's not fooling anyone by holding that Axe !
Note To Self : "Vh1 Divas"...ANOTHER show for Heff to skip.
Re : Melanie Griffith - Everybody knows, " when you wanna party, GO TO UTAH !!"
"Smoke 'em if ya got 'em" - gotcha. You know, Jessica Biel's ass should've DOUBLED as the "Gold Image" or two....Just Sayin'.
Have a GREAT weekend, BDS !
Heff - That's OK Heff, it's the attempt that counts. Ha. And appreciate the detail, so Lohan probably got high and just misplaced the stuff looking for more coke, the Gosselins both just need to leave, I would pay good money to watch that walnut cracking, just started the Montag issue yesterday and haven't seen the spread yet (but will take your word), a guitar is just another prop for Madonna, I'll be right there not watching that show with you, maybe you know something about Utah I don't, you're right about Biel as that GQ spread (where pics came from) was golden. Happy Friday Heff.
In a recent report, Jessica Biel was named the celebrity when searched online to most likely lead to a computer virus. In related news, Pamela Anderson was named the celebrity most likely to lead to any virus.
That's all I've got today!
Enjoy your weekend.
lol Heff "it hurts to SUCK on TWO TOTALLY DIFFERENT features..." ha
It looks as though she bought her flesh colored outfit from Britney Spears' garage sale, eh?
Have a good weekend and I don't smoke, so...never mind.
Kmwthay - Ha. I like that one a lot. I wish I would have gone down that path myself as the danger/middle name thing leapt at me and never looked back. Happy Friday.
Jlee - Heff was right about Montag, although I think you could broaden it out as she stinks at pretty much everything. And I thought the same thing about the outfit as it reminded me of a B. Spears re-tread. Finally, but you have hands. Ha. Happy Friday.
I guess this was the Gypsies, Tramps and Thieves addition of QHF.
LEUTONIANS RULE!
4 dollars to the first person who understands the reference to Leutonians.
Now B you know I love me a gypsy but wtf gives Madonna the right to go over there and start preaching to the Romanians in their own country. The woman just knows how to work the press and get herself maximum publicity. Bet she didn't count on the boos though.
It sounds like The Miss Universe Pageant was the perfect place for Heidi whatshername to launch her singing career. The whole bloody show is pointless drivel.
Poor old Mel, she's always been a bit of a train wreck but that's one of the nicest pics I've seen of her in a long time.
Great wrap up B and have an awesome weekend.
Troll Y2K - An excellent point, and I had no idea about the Leutonians reference, so I'm glad you threw down the gauntlet for someone to step forward (though the pay-out is far less than the Pee Wee Herman one of a few weeks ago)> Happy Friday.
KayDee - Madonna likes to do that kind of stuff, so I'm not really surprised. Somebody probably whispered it to her as she went onstage and she felt like saying something about it. :) And you're right about the pointless drivel. Finally, I felt like doing something nice for Griffith (not sure why exactly) so I picked that pic as most were pretty rough. Happy Friday KayDee.
Apparently, Jon Gosselin has forgotten that most folks with 9-5 jobs don't take the kinds of vacations he's been taking recently, or date the kind of women, or enjoy the kind of luxuries...
Okay, $$, I know you know so you gotta help me...where the hell did Heidi Montag come from in the first place (yeah, I know, she got her start on The Hills ~ I meant more, which circle of hell) and why is she EVERYWHERE in spite of being, well, her.
Jessica Biel is reaching Sienna Miller level of annoyingness (imo) and Madonna really needs to eat something. Not only will it make her look better but it will keep her quiet for a minute or two.
I saw a snippet of her performance on the net and it was AWFUL!! I also saw Miss Universe....or whomever....from last year drop the crown before passing it along...that made me laugh.
Clearly the Romanians need a lesson in equality and being kind to others.....oh Madge....at least she tried!
Bostonpobble - Yeah, Gosselin is so out of touch with any kind of reality that it's slightly disconcerting (and a bit ironic given he got his fame from 'reality tv'). Laughed out loud about Montag and the Circle of Hell as she and Spencer Pratt can share a ring. Finally, Madonna's arms have been looking really creepy lately even though you couldn't tell from that pic. Happy Friday Pobble.
Miss Ash - I missed the crown dropping . . . will have to look that up. As for Montag, she has no discernible talent whatsoever, so I'm not suprised her performance was awful. And Madonna was actually right about there being widespread Gypsy discrimination in Eastern Europe (at least somewhat), but it was still pretty funny she was booed. Happy Friday.
I'm so in agreement with everything wigsf said. When will this tootsie pop's fifteen seconds be OVER?
I saw pictures of the Lohan break-in that made it look like Lindsay had done the actual job herself. Just another day in Holly-weird.
Have a great weekend!
This is the second Ferris Bueller reference I've seen this week. Bill Simmons talked about it at great length in his mailbag on espn. Specifically, trying to figure out if Ferris and Co. really could've pulled all that off in a day. It was a good read.
Oddly, Montag gives a very charming interview. Too bad that Miss Universe performance was so awful. Hope the weekend treated you well!
LOL, that Jessica Biel story was hilarious. I would have thought, it would be Alba, but I guess not.
p.s saw Inglourious Basterds a couple days ago and I thought it was great. Most of the scenes did drag with overuse of dialogue, but I still really liked it. I think its easily one of Tarantino's best film. I'm very curious to see how the Blu Ray will look considering the movie looked gorgeous in theaters. Might not buy it on day 1, but will definitely buy it as soon as I can find it for a good price.
Boxer - I'm with WIGSF and you on this too. I just hope she goes away forever. And soon. I wouldn't be surprised about Lohan either as she is just one lost soul about now. Hope you had a good weekend.
Native Minnow - I need to go find that article. It sounds like a good one as I can see how dissecting that day could be pretty funny.
Linda - Really? I guess I"ve never listened to her being interviewed. Ha. Hope you had a good weekend yourself.
Farzan - I liked 'Basterds' a little more now than when I first saw it. I would probably give it a B only because I hold Tarantino to a very high standard. I'm just afraid he's slipping into a pattern with these table conversations. Ha. That being said, I bet it looks good on 'Blu Ray' so it's probably worth an early buy. Probably.
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