Blog Archive

Bathing With The Drunken Viking: Old Friends Edition . . .

Posted by 2 Dollar Productions Monday, May 18, 2009

{This is the 27th entry in a recurring series that will only happen when I have consumed far too many spirits. This past weekend, I had several old friends in town who I had not seen for durations spanning two to five years, so there was lots of celebrating with far too much Fat Tire, Anchor Steam, Vanilla Porter, Spaten and Sam Adams Summer Ale consumed which which triggered strange thoughts, candid insights and pure horseshit. Selah.}

* Re-living old stories with old friends is simpler than making new ones, because now, everyone gets too tired too quickly to create them as easily.

* Regardless, the new ones cannot begin to form until all the small children are stowed away in their respective hotel rooms.

* Although hangovers are impossible to erase, you can undercut all of them with sex and a fried egg sandwich the next day, possibly even at the same time.

* Always buy your recently struggling friends as many rounds as possible without making any mention of it.

* Houseguests are far more enjoyable to have around late at night versus the morning

* Never run out of beer, water, aspirin, and especially toilet paper with guests in town.

* It is never a good idea to watch pornography with a room full of guys.

* I swear that more than half the female groups I see at bars downtown are mainly there to document the night for their Facebook pages versus being available for conversation

* When guests leave, the floor is ALWAYS sticky and it’s never clear exactly how it happened

* There are few things lonlier than being hungover on a Monday morning.

* “Alcohol may be man's worst enemy, but the bible says love your enemy.” – Frank Sinatra



  1. kmwthay Says:
  2. It sounds like you had a great time catching up with old friends. I’ve never understood the inevitable sticky floor - especially when you know no one ever spilled anything. It makes me wonder if someone pulled out the porn after everyone else passed out? ew.

  3. wigsf Says:
  4. Girl groups in bars suck. They all behave like complete bitches to me.

  5. JLee Says:
  6. I know what you mean about girls in bars. I see flashes going off every 5 minutes with little else going on. Crazy kids. Glad you enjoyed your company and lived to tell about it ;)

  7. Heff Says:
  8. Ah, my favorite 2Dollar feature. Kind of a shock to see it on Monday though, lol.

  9. Kmwthay - Ha. I was thinking something alone those lines too. But seriously, how does this happen? It never gets sticky when it's just me over the course of a weekend? Bizarre.

    WIGSF - Groups - girls or guys - of more than 3, maybe 4 at most are too unwieldly and you can't hold any kind of reasonable conversation with them. They're on their own islands . . .

    Jlee - Exactly. Flashes all the time and not the good kind. Ha. I did enjoy the weekend, and luckily, there was no jail time or anything too bad other than a headache and a sleep deficiet (sp?).

    Heff - I know. Even the Viking doesn't like to come out on a Monday. Ha. And it will be a dry-ish week from my vantage point right now.

  10. Boxer Says:
  11. "Re-living old stories with old friends is simpler than making new ones, because now, everyone gets too tired too quickly to create them as easily"

    Aahahahahah - SO true. Sounds like you had a great weekend, but that Monday Morning restart?

    Not so fun.

  12. nobich Says:
  13. sex & fried egg at the same time. hmmmm interesting. Ha!

  14. Linda Says:
  15. Sounds like quite a weekend .... had a Sam Adams Summer Ale myself on Saturday, quite tasty. Agree with you on house guests in the morning, I just want to be left alone...unless they are making Bloody Marys. Monday hangovers suck, but then so do Mondays. And from here the week should look better.

  16. Boxer - Unfortunately, it is true. Ha. And yep, I could do with another weekend to recover from my weekend.

    Nobich - It's a challenge, but if you can pull it off, then you're golden. Ha.

    Linda - That's right about the morning houseguests - unless they want to make BM's and/or cook eggs, then I could really do without them. Ha. And yes, Mondays aren't that good under the best of circumstances, so adding to the haze with a headache isn't the worst thing. 'Let the Right One In' slated for tonight, which will help.

  17. BostonPobble Says:

    A fried egg sandwich is a gift from the Gods the morning after.

    Sounds like a great weekend. Even as a drunken viking, you are pure class, $$, as is shown in this post on numerous occasions. Although I am surprised at the lack of Stella in the opening paragraph.

  19. slopmaster Says:
  20. I recently had a party so all of these are close to the heart... also reminds me to continue drunk blogging, it is much too fun.

    the quote is genius btw.

  21. Gypsy Says:
  22. I remember those days and thank the Big Kahuna that they are long over.

    Glad you had a great weekend but sorry that there is a nasty price to pay.

  23. Bostonpobble - "A fried egg sandwich is a gift from the Gods the morning after" - so, so right. Ha. As for the Stella, it was a tough choice, but the weather was a little cooler, so I went a little darker than I would when it's above 90 degrees. Stella will return soon enough.

    Slopmaster - It can be fun, and probably less costly than texting as you can always pull a post down if it turns out to be embarassing. And if you had a party, then I almost guarantee that your floor was sticky by the end.

    Romany Angel - I'm just glad it is spaced out because I can't handle this on a regular basis anymore. Ha. That is probably a good thing, adn I'm feeling human again now.

  24. So it's not just Vegas where everyone is concerned about taking profile pics for their myspace/facebook page. They're probably the same groups of people who talk over the music at a concert too. I hate that.

  25. Miss Ash Says:
  26. Never run out of TP or your friends might use your socks!

  27. Farzan Says:
  28. Sounds like a good get together.

  29. Native Minnow - Nope, it's everywhere. Unfortunately. And that concert thing is a big pet peeve of mine as well, so I'm right there with you.

    Miss Ash - That is a horrible, horrible thought. Ha. Let's hope it never comes to that.

    Farzan - Defnitely a good time, and now that I'm rested, it seems even better. Ha.

  30. Heff Says:
  31. Sorry for the A.I. nonsense, but it's easy blog-fodder that garners comments, lol.

    Playboy post on Friday.

  32. Heff - Excellent news. I'll be back up with QHF as well as it's been a hairy week, hence the lack of posts.


About Me

Contact Us

You can reach us by email at