Followers

Blog Archive

Screw the Shadow: Groundhog Attacks

Posted by 2 Dollar Productions Wednesday, February 02, 2005

I had forgotten it was Groundhog Day this morning until I flipped on the TV and saw a huge crowd of people freezing their asses off somewhere back east.

Ever since the excellent Bill Murray movie, "Groundhog Day," was released I've had a fond place in my heart for the animal. They seem like solid creatures with an uncanny knack for predicting the weather, although they do look like they were formed after a mutant squirrel mated with a possum.

Anyway, as I watched the TV numerous people in the crowd seemed to share my admiration for the Groundhog as they waited for it to appear. On the other hand, many just seemed liquored up and almost anything might have excited them.

But then the Groundhog came out of hiding.

Or rather he was pulled out of hiding by an old man in a silly hat who then held the poor Groundhog aloft and twirled him like the Olympic torch before reading his lengthy proclamation.

As I watched this spectacle I couldn't help but root for the Groundhog to one day turn on somebody and just go crazy. The attack would be justified in my mind because if someone woke me from a warm, heavy slumber and then grabbed me and held me in the air while hundreds of maniacs screamed I would be more than a little pissed off.

So I've decided from this year forth I will try my best to watch this event live in hopes of witnessing some carnage. The odds of a Groundhog attack might seem slim, but one of these years it WILL happen and I'm going to be watching.

And cheering for the Groundhog.

-BDS



0 comments

About Me


Contact Us

You can reach us by email at twodollarproductions@live.com